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Mitch Hedberg

Submitted by GuyGG on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 4:06am
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Hedberg, Mitch
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Severed foot is an ultimate stocking stuffer. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
I want to hang a map of the world in my house, then I am going to put pins into all the locations I have traveled to. But first... Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus or just a really cool opotamus? Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
If I had a dollar for every time I said that, I'd be making money in a very weird way. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
You know they call corn-on-the-cob "corn-on-the-cob" right? But that's how it comes out of the ground, man. They... Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
I had this parrot. The parrot talked, but it did not say "I'm hungry." So it died. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said,"Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every... Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
I saw a commercial on late night TV, it said, "Forget everything you know about slipcovers." So I did. And it was a... Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
Title Type Added
Severed foot is an ultimate stocking stuffer. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
I want to hang a map of the world in my house, then I am going to put pins into all the locations I have traveled to. But first... Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus or just a really cool opotamus? Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
If I had a dollar for every time I said that, I'd be making money in a very weird way. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
You know they call corn-on-the-cob "corn-on-the-cob" right? But that's how it comes out of the ground, man. They... Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
I had this parrot. The parrot talked, but it did not say "I'm hungry." So it died. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said,"Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every... Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
I saw a commercial on late night TV, it said, "Forget everything you know about slipcovers." So I did. And it was a... Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago
The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall. Quote 1 year 24 weeks ago